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11.07.00 11:31 a.m.

"We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless thing is that one admires it intensely.
All art is quite useless."


  -Oscar Wilde 


Created on 3/21/01 from a letter written to Kate.
Response 2021.03.03
Why, precisely, is it that Kate and her friends objectify people to justify their actions? I'm frankly tired of being treated as an object and rather think I deserve to be treated as a human being.
Throughout this... emotional melee... I have always remembered that she is a human being, one whom I'm infinitely fond of despite the artifice she covers herself in to be "free," and I love her as much as I would love anyone who had shown me the depths their soul can reach. She flawed and fallible, for she is of flesh, but she is wonderful because of it, not despite it.
All I am asking is for her to see me as I am. Rather, I wish she would not allow others to further this denigration of me. I have seen that she tries to see me as I am, and I appreciate that. But I have also seen her lose that clarity. That tendency is what I want space from, not her. I want to hold her close and tell her secrets, because she amazes me constantly as all those I love do. So she should see me as I AM. Not the symbol of "boyfriend" and "relationship" which she associates with her systematic oppression and her perceived loss of freedom and gained experiences. I am not a symbol and do not wish to be, now or ever.


reading: objectifying poetry that makes me weep
listening: snifflingwanting: to be three dimensional
interesting thought: Merely because I seek to be kind to one I love, it does not mean they won't be hurt.

Thomm Quackenbush is an author and teacher in the Hudson Valley. He has published four novels in his Night's Dream series (We Shadows, Danse Macabre, Artificial Gods, and Flies to Wanton Boys). He has sold jewelry in Victorian England, confused children as a mad scientist, filed away more books than anyone has ever read, and tried to inspire the learning disabled and gifted. He is capable of crossing one eye, raising one eyebrow, and once accidentally groped a ghost. When not writing, he can be found biking, hiking the Adirondacks, grazing on snacks at art openings, and keeping a straight face when listening to people tell him they are in touch with 164 species of interstellar beings. He likes when you comment.